Hello, today was like waiting for chocolate (when you are Jewish and keep kosher, you need to wait few hours since you ate meat to eat dairy), but backwards.
So, today was wonderful, at least started this way.
I laughed and smiled a lot.
Nice, yes, very nice.
I even ate a cake! (cake in the reason of happiness in the world).
So, after fun 4 school hours, of playing most of time Line Play (android version), one of the people that my parents asked for his help (about cyber bullying, and life destroying on the web), didn't came.
And that sucked.
Very much.
I got so depressed, I felt like I missed something.
When something that supposed to occur, didn't, I feel like people abandon me.
So, for the maximum of pain, I had to dance today.
I hate to dance, in the serious way.
Like when goofing with friends it's fun, but when doing it to perform, I feel like everything else I do in front of people, I hate it.
It's same with any kind of other art.
And for another pain, my friend smacked my lightly.
Well, that's fine.
But it hit the helix.
And I felt (it's about the 8th time in this month, and third day on a row) like my ear is torn apart.
So I have this weird crush on Gal.
Is it creepy?
Well, only my heart (this goddamn piece of bloody meat) can tell.
Today at shifting, not only that I wasn't on the regular with Gal, I was with the Y's, it wasn't a problem, until they sang a very rude song about one friend of mine, and I asked them to stop, but as a cruel tease they continued.
Well, I stood up for bullying, even if it's behind a back.
How is it to cut yourself?
I miss the feeling.
The pain you can feel, a one that sometimes can go over your feelings?
I won't take it back if I had a choice.
But I would burn my lungs, or just the tips of my fingers.
Seems hot (silly word game).
I think about it half the time lately.
The other time I think about the nothing that happens.
Staring on a wall.
My parents talking.
But I need doing.
And more of all, I hate the dumb excuse.
It'll make a humiliation.
YOU DON'T SAY.
Captain obvious, your ship is ready to sail to island Stfu.
Why should I suffer daily this twat?
That's annoying.
They (everyone) treat like nothing happened.
Like I don't feel dead and keep wishing it to happen.
Like there's no broken girl you see break a little more everyday.
Like you cannot see the thick mask, that is so worn off.
Picture me.
I don't know if you really know how I look daily.
You can see few faces.
When you see someone daily, you can picture them perfectly, every tiny detail, from the curls in her hair behind her ears, the ones that always fall perfectly.
To the edge of her nose, the sharpness.
And how her eyes twitch when she laugh.
Bore, is on my face.
Will someone remember me, or someone will pass my grave on his field trip, and watch my name, and show it to all of his friends and they will all giggle together, because I own such a weird name.
So for my regular piece of mind about my stumbling friend, Keren.
So, Keren.
Oh, Keren.
Tell me, what do you think?
Seriously, darling.
You annoying as fuck.
Please, tell me what do you think you are even doing.
It's irretating.
The best example is probably this.
 |
| Guess who's annoying? |
Like I'm princess of my group, and the tayls hanging around.
Yali is the queen of the dumb that their future is to pick their new dominator.
And Gal, is the popular.
Simple as that.
So she will fall.
And I'll watch it.
Crumbling old friend that I stopped caring about, because she just stand by.
Oh well.
Keren, oh Keren.
Goodbye.
So, can you believe that it's the last month of school?!
What?!
What?!
I can't believe that seven years has gone so fast!
7 years I'm in this system.
From preschool, to 6th grade.
Wow.
So many to remember.
So many to hate.
So close to end.
On the end of the month, no more school.
Not this school.
To middle school (Junior High).
To sport class.
To a different place.
To different (better and worse) people.
To a new things.
That's a lot.
So many to take.
Too many to take.
Why so early?
And why so late?
Last monthof this warm, cozy family.
That their leaders switched four times.
From shouting, to loving, to killing, to pushing.
I finished my school with two different teachers, and a lot of the other proffesinal teachers, and 4 principals.
Fun.
Nah.
So goodbye nation.
Only one thing.
If somebody will ask me what is my favorite thing about my favorite bands.
I'd go like this.
Black Veil Brides: they're all werewolves in denial.
My Chemical Romance: if you saw their funny moments, you'll die laughing.
Panic! At The Disco: that thery're using in words that I never believed that existed, and making me smarter.
Berries, survivors,
I hope you'll make it.
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