It's not the usual beginning of a post, but since when we have regulars? Everything in here should be different, except the ending, it's good for knowing it's the real blog, and even when the background changes, it's still it.
So:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/tabathaleggett/incredibly-intricate-pictures-you-werent-believe-werent-p
This beautiful thing is more then just something you can describe in words.
It's like, all the goodness in the world, but in shades of blue and green, and coated with chocolate and nuts (but if you are allergic to nuts, so it will be sprinkles).
I loved it.
I can't even say what are my favorites.
It's almost everything.
The butterfly one is not a one that I liked.
But everything there.
That photographer is a brilliant man.
....
I'm jealous of the children with all of those suburbs chores, and those kids with divorced parents, sometimes orphans too.
I'm jealous out of every white kid, or black, I'm jealous of people with beautiful hair, and with big eyes.
I'm jealous of those tiny skinny girls, and the loved fat ones.
I'm jealous of those ones with a pretty big room, or that huge wardrobe because they are rich.
I'm jealous of those kids that everything comes easy to them, and those kids who have willpower.
I'm jealous of those that their parents don't give a shit about, and those ones who can go outside without any shame.
I'm jealous of those ones that can wear everything they want, because they feel confident in it, and the ones who have the body for it.
I'm jealous about those talented people, and of those normal ones.
I'm jealous of those who are in school everyday, and those who have fun.
I'm jealous of everybody in England or North America.
I'm jealous of the ones that aren't being called annoying daily by everyone, and the ones who are getting compliments.
I'm jealous of the ones that just don't have to fake things.
But with it, and with all the things I ever learned.
I know my life are pretty awesome.
I'm not in the best moment of my life, because I haven't reached it.
Not like the other people, that might reach it too soon (Like Bugs, and not Daffy), and I know I'm going good.
I go to school only five days a week, and the sixth for a special school, where I learn even more things.
Sometimes they are boring, sometimes not.
And I try my best at keeping up, so I would good grades, and the entry to the sort of high school class I want will be easier.
I do my hardest for myself.
So I could be proud of myself.
So I won't ever end up like all the other people.
I don't have many people that I care about.
And it's good.
Because, if not for myself, than, for who?
Not for my parents.
Or my teachers.
Or everybody else I know.
For myself.
I wait that my sun will shine, and I plan it to be the best of all suns in the fucking universe.
And this place?
The biggest scrapbook of my memories.
My story.
My life.
Shared, with people I never saw, never heard of, never had any kind of interaction with, but they know me, better than anybody else.
And you are became part of me.
You are people, probably the best things that happened to me.
The people who cared enough, and tried more than everybody else to understand, that stayed, and supported, and were just there, to a little girl, that is confused, and have no idea what she ever did wrong.
But you are.
You just care, and you are there for me.
I don't know if I could ever tell you how much I love you for doing so.
Because.
In some way.
You saved my life.
Not music as many people believed it saved them.
Not like religion, that even more.
But you, few angels that sent from fucking earth, to protect.
You are a part of the rare angels that are on earth.
You know.
That they I promised you I won't kill myself, and I will post almost everyday, to prove you that no matter what, you can stay alive?
It helped me, a lot.
That they I wrote about never becoming a number in the statics chart?
That you are more than just a number?
I always remind it to myself, when I actually consider ending it up, because it's not that hard.
At least I didn't stole my friends' pills they had, because they were sick on the past few days.
You are the best thing ever.
You deserve to get a prize.
For saving a life.
Because you are my heroes.
The people around the world with Internet connection.
The people that never said a word, but it was enough.
....
I'll never be able to show you how much it means to me.
It means the world to me.
Wait.
No.
It means much more.
It means the life for me.
You gave me a gift that only few person can give you, the will to live.
So yes, maybe my father's ejaculations and my mothers uterus created my beating heart, and my slightly overly used flesh, but nothing ever told me that life is worthy like you did.
Today, I got bored to death.
I'm so annoying.
All day I was like "die" "why are you so fucking annoying?!" "stop" "now" "you deserve it" "I wish you could die" and each part was meant for myself.
At least I drew hally potel and his enemy voldemolt.
It's weird.
But since it was Chinese lesson, and I felt super racist (most people can feel happy, sad, angry and such, I can feel racist, it's great), so Chinese aren't super good at pronouncing R's, so it sounds like L', and that's how hally potel was created.
And I also drew them.
Hally looked like a fucking egg with a thunder on it's forehead, and voldemolt wore a bikini and egg's insides of Hally's dead parents.
Nice of me.
And I drew some sort of a family.
It started from a guy who wore girl's clothing, his name is Steve.
And then a sister for Steve, Carla, which wears guys clothing.
And than parents, La-queesha and George, LQ wore a female shirt and male pants, and have a mustache and ponytails, and George, well, he had those comics looking butt chins (why I like watching superhero movies, the fucking chins, they look like tiny butts!), and weird chin, like a fucking stairs or something, had his hair combed backwards with gel (like all the guys I know, and it doesn't always look good, because their hair is naturally pretty!) and he wore manly shirt, and skirt with those fishnet pantyhose with ballet flats.
Healthy family.
Well.
I'm going to watch TV, until 9:30, and then play with my iPhone, and wake up early enough so I will be able to watch TV/draw.
I'm working on some greenhaired elf, with a purple haired friends, it's hard to explain but I'll show you it when I think it's the time.
For now, my first finished one with naked tits.
Naked boobs are hard.
And the hair.
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I'm proud of myself.
But I know I could do better with the hair.
And the tits and face.
But I like the knee shading I've done.
And the light stripes.
I have a lot to learn.
But I'm getting better each time.
And it's good.
Every slight baby step for achieving your goal is still a step to success.
Berries, Survivors,
I hope you'll make it.
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