Moment

Fuck you Keren.
Worst psychologist ever.
My mum told me that if I want to stop it, I need to do whatever she says.
Well, I don't mind doing it, but, it's including arts, with her, in the room.
I love drawing, it's the humans I hate.
And I less like to do it the original way, I like to do it with my iPhone, where it's much easier with much more options.

Oh, god, why to take me to a demon, I know that I would like to go to a therapist that will mess my mind and do whatever he can and after two months I'll go back home.
That simple.

And who the fuck told that I thought that I will suicide?
This is the most low thing to say (not even speaking about believing) and especially from my parents.
It's crazy.
It's so annoying that they discovered it too late and they think I'm still doing it.
I think it's the thing that hurts most.
They have to remind it to me, until I'm happy and I'm not even depressed a little in mind, I'm forced to be someone I stopped to be.
And when it giving more pain the memories, it's a punishment that will forever hunt me, one of many others that will forever burn.

I don't have daddy issues, no mama issues.
Just issues.
That I caused.
I own the blame.


You know what hurts the most?
That everything I thought I have, is lost.
But after all, it might be that I don't own the blame.
And it's the worst kind of fame.

I got what I thought I want.
But it wasn't the thing I needed, this is why they hunt.
Waiting for the day.
And then, they'll stay.
Until they'll fade away.

This was another thing I don't do in public.
Another private skill in my world.


So, today was nothing.
Just rehearsals.
Boring dance.
Boring music.
Boring people.
All the day until I got with my never-boring friends.
Okay, so somehow I ended playing with Guy (another guy -wordgame!- that isn't in the clique but we don't mind hanging with) and Gal (the guy) and one of the Idos, and Gal (drag) in FunRun.
It was so fun.
One time, a second before the finish line, one guy called me (to make me to lose) and it was so funny.
Well, you can't understand when you're not there.


Sometimes your days go brighter from one small memory.
And if I had a photo I would put, but check stuff on extras, I found some funny tweets.


Goodbye.

Berries, survivors,
I hope you'll make it.