I'm a bit scared.
Why?
Well, fucking meeting a person that'll give me something that will affect me.
At least I slept. [Nine-thirty until five thirty, which is really good.]
I have enough energy to go to school, even though that in the morning I didn't have as much, it scared me that I'm going to go back to enjoying it too much and going for a long while with it.
I'll function today, I won't enjoy it, sure, but I'll go through it.

OH FUCK IT'S FUCKING FRIGHTENING.
In less than twelve hours.
I don't want to do anything.
Wait, what did I just wrote?
 I must do everything.
If I won't... Well, fuck.
Like it wasn't enough that I just crying yesterday, and brushed people off.

Oh, I should eat.
But I'm not hungry, nor have any appetite.
I just hope I'd get it gone before the urge to weigh myself will be irresistible.
I want to weigh myself now, of course, I wonder if I actually lose weight or maintain, or hell, impossibly gain.

I don't want to track what I eat, because I'm afraid that if I'd do so, I'd have carvings and I'd be confused by fake hunger.

I'm good now without eating, it consumes less thought and I'm okay.
Sure, I do get weak, very weak, but it's also the mix of everything I swallow and the fact that the coughing is so horrendous that I feel bad for coughing in class.

I'm in class, munching on the tip of an empty icicle cover. 

It's basically my main meal for a while. 

I wonder what I'll eat at lunch. 

The thing with the icicles, is that they taste just as bad as always but it's cold. 

Makin my fingers numb, and my throat feel better. 

I'm considering going home. 

I know I shouldn't. 

But it's so fucking hard to carry on. 

Why can't I just die already?

I hope that this prizma [i started writing prizma and it transformed it to a "prizma"] will make me exhausted enough to sleep all day because I got no damn power. 

It's too fucking hard. 

I want to stop.