Bephs

Me, hair, um.. no.
Too short, it came too short.
Well, it will grow back and until that school will start I'd look like a human being.

So, I'm getting really sick from my mom.
I remember I saw a movie once, when the child divorces from his parents and traveling around the world to find new parents.
I liked that movie.
But I won't divorce from my parents (I don't even know if this think exist).
I absolutely can't stand my mom, but my dad, well, my dad is something.
I still want to leave my mom.
Can't stand her.
She's doing it all the time.
Yelling until I'm scared to being a radios of a mile from her, and then she's upset because I'm not telling it.
Fuck me and fuck my life.

Today I "discovered" a band named AFI, which I'm not sure if I like, well I do, and I am impressed that he have a guy voice, but I didn't checked the lyrics.
And I heard somebody named David Bowie.
I don't like David Bowie.

But I saw the video clip of Heaven of Depeche Mode, I like this song, and I liked also the clip.

Is it weird that I like the intro of Some Nights more than the song itself?
I just guess I like the Medieval (the intro reminds me it, reminds me a lot the music lessons in school, with Bach and Mozart, and the rest which I forget), I got it from my dad.
I used to paint and build tiny "action figures" of Samurais and knights, it was nice, to place the head and dye his hair, and make his armory shine in silver spark.
We used to play a game named Crusader, and I loved to build the castle and to know how to manage the village, to make tons of wood and more food and give more food and then make them pay high taxes.
And then to attack the purple king.



Well, I'd like some sleep.
but I won't get it.

Do you know what's keeping me alive?
Not killing myself, not poisoning myself? (kind of ironic because if the name of the blog).
To not becoming one of the statics.
So that people won't pity for me, that nobody will see that coming.
That I won't be part of my self note I keep reminding myself every time I feel like dying.
I ask myself and answer all the time the same thing.

How many people died today?
Too many.

And I don't want to overload it.



That bitch!
Because of her I need to change my plans for her last minute ones.
Fuck her.
Seriously.
I hope she'll die in slow  painful torture.


So, I'll be off and on again.
12:23


19:22
Okay, I'm back.
Without mustache and with clear armpits.
Sorry for letting you know it.
I'm in love with sims.
I'm trying to get now how to "decorate" the locker version of the Poison Book.
I already dyed to cover in black & blue.
But I want it special.


21:03

Dear Keren.
GO TO FUCK YOURSELF.
Such a coward.
There are boys, and a horror movie.
I want to sit next to him (by the way, hot news!) and to munch snacks.
And wear something pretty but not ridiculous.
Some tank top and shorts or something.
Or a long sweatpants (they are pretty!).
And I'd die to sneak him a kiss, but since I'm 12 and not need other problems, I just need to satisfy with imagination.
But "key-key" don't be such a bitch.
Hint! Me and Maya (it was so hard to not notice it) have a crush on him, so fuck off, until he agreed to show the fuck up, you won't us pick the movie.
Note taken in my book, coward bitch, and still doesn't get hints that are quiet obvious.
Screw you Kunt (I gave her the nickname in the book, Keren the Kunt.
Or Keren the Kooka.

Well hot news, I actually have two.
First, he talked to me today, and it was nice, he made me laugh, I think he did it in purpose (but I still have imagination that tells me it).
And the big amazing news (that was more for me!) 1000 BLOG VIEWS!
Guys that's amazing!
I didn't expected it!
Seriously when I started (not at the embarrassing nick award crap) I thought that nobody will read, and then readers came.
From Russia and Germany, and America and French, And China, and Netherlands, and so many, even places that I don't know where are they (well, everyone knows how much I suck at geography.)

Guys!
I'm excited.
Just kidding, the feeling left me about after an hour since I saw it.


Well, right now I've noticed something.
the 9th on April is the blog anniversary, and a year later and month before, on the 9th on March is a memorial day for me.
Where I got in the trouble.
About the discover of self-harm.
And month later, my favorite day ever.
I don't like this coincidence.


I think that I like him.
As a friend and as more.
It's like, that I want that we won't be more then friends (best friends are good enough), but still like him as more, I just need to be closer to him.
I feel better with this pure boy.
I wonder how he will look after the guy transoformation (when they don't look like a girls with short hair).

By the way hair, have you noticed that every drummmer have fliffy and/or flippy hair?
It's true, even in Victorious (I just love kat!) the drummer in the first episode have it.
And I know someone who used to be in my class ( I stopped being in the same class with him since the first of July), and he have black flippy hair, he's short, but if he'll get taller and in a band, I'm getting VIP bitches!

I love you.
And I'm not drunk.

Weird?
Nope.


Just one thing, do you know the name of the one who stands on the left bottom in Set The World On Fire album cover?
Because he's the one that reminds my sister our last principal.
It's still funny, and making hard times for me, to hold my laugh.


You know what sucks?
That the only concerts in this summer are of Pitbull, and Rihanna, and Psy.
Why is it so hard to bring rock band.
Green day is the minimum I ask for, everybody loves Green Day, it's nothing to ask for.
Just a small visiting in two years.
I'm not asking for less common bands like Sleeping With Sirens, or Black Veil Brides, or Pierce The Veil, or Panic! At The Disco.
I know that 30 Seconds To Mars won't come, and not even talking about My Chemical Romance, that the chances that they will make a comeback in ten years exactly in Israel is high as the chance that all the girls in the globe won't have self-esteem problems.
Though I have a solution, kill all the girls, and then there's no girl problems!
I work the Stalin method, to kill.
I'm quiet creative at killing.
Like making somebody watch Twilight endlessly while an electric shockers are connected to your body and go off when you start talking.
Or just hearing Taylor Swift while (you don't need a while, the torture of Taylor is enough.)

Bephs.
That the new vagina nickname, Bephs.
You say it Befs.
Well, it's the time that my beph will start doing some girly shit online.

Be back soon.


I decided that my bephs time is over!
And it still want to flirt.
Oh god.
I'm so weird.

Well I hope that it will turn alright.


And the movie thing, we making a movie night!
This Saturday, my room, horror movie.
Only I love it?
I have skittles, and  I'll get something else.
And I need to make sure that the book is hidden!
Imagine the enormous shit load that will fall if someone will read it!


So, back to journal decorating.
I'm going to check stuff up.

Okay, what do you think about the idea that I'll write a "diary" and upload photos of it everyday, so you'll be able to read it, like another kind of blog.
Well, since you never comment,
Don't comment if you want me to do it.
And if you don't want me to do it, don't comment.
Anyway I'll do it.


I got inspired from this cute blog!
nadefagus.blogspot.co.il
It's full with asian cuteness!

So, I'll add few gadgets and open a blog (and redesign this blog) so, get reay annoucments and other crap tomorrow.


Goodnight, Vagina Owners (best nickname for girls) & Cock Shovers (for guys).

Berries, survivors,
I hope you'll make it.